About Patricia

What you’ve never wanted to know, but now you’ll learn about it anyway.

Zeichnung von Patricia Penn im Porträtformat

Patricia is into obscure trivia. Such as: Horses cannot do and think at the same time. So after every exercise, they should be given a moment to meditate upon the lesson. Also: In dangerous situations, we’ll freeze whenever we don’t see how either running or fighting could save us. And: Research on serial killers tends to neglect the gender point of view.

Thus Patricia is not the greatest conversationalist in the world. This explains why she prefers writing, and has been typing over five hundred letters a minute ever since she was a teen.

Five random facts about Patricia: 

  1. Patricia is very close to being awarded a doctorate in (modern German) literature. Yes. Seriously. Since it took her ridiculously long to get there, she will insist on being called “Dr. Patricia” for at least a month once she gets it. Even in the bedroom. (Especially in the bedroom).
  2. Since literature research – modern German or otherwise – is not one of the occupations with the money, Patricia makes hers by explaining to small company owners how online marketing works. Or otherwise how to make it work better. A tiny bitty motivation for making this website might have been that she wanted to test whether her great advise makes any sense practically.
  3. The most important being in Patricia’s universe is her Golden Retriever – a soft-furred little man of such ridiculousness that she would have long since published a children’s book about his adventures if she could draw. He refuses to leave the house in the company of strangers. And he gets terribly scared when the skies bark at him.
  4. Patricia isn’t just more comfortable with dogs over humans, but also with horses. She usually rides a brown gelding with a black mane who once ate enough grass in two days for his saddle to stop fitting.
  5. After a very long time as an avid fanfiction reader and writer, Patricia has become an unapologetic fandom hopper. Some of her 2018 fandoms included Les Misèrables, Criminal Minds, Travelers, and The Walking Dead. One time, somebody wrote fanfiction for an original story of hers; this was both absolutely amazing and extremely weird.

And now, hush, go read the fic — that is considerably more interesting than soul striptease, Patricia style. Or if you’re already through with that, sign up for the newsletter so to not miss any updates. I’d be flattered if you did that. Really flattered. 

Yours, Patricia